Thursday, December 10, 2009

We're thinking retirement

So here's the thing.  You know how vampires are all wicked popular now, right?  Not popular like in my day, when Anne Rice was the coolest vampire thing going and you had to slog through pages and pages of teeny tiny print describing ancient New Orleans.  Not to knock Anne Rice.  I loved those books.  And dreamed of somehow becoming a vampire before any of this Team Edward-Team Jacob malarky. 

My real point here (which is actually not to sound like a high minded octegenarian), is that I think we may have hit the lottery.  I'm pretty sure the Pixie is on her way to vampirism.  (Is that a word?) My evidence:

Exhibit A:  Girlfriend is a night owl.  We put her to bed at a normal time, usually 7:30 to 8. She will stay in her crib (um, yeah. She's 3.5 and still in her crib. What of it?)  and talk to herself or her animals, "read" books and generally hang out until late.  I'm talking ten o'clock late!  The other night I was reading in the living room and I hear her singing to herself.  I get up and look at the clock, 9:45.  I go closer to listen to what she is singing and really got a laugh.  "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg..."  Hilarious. 
She also hates getting up in the morning.  That might be because she isn't going to bed until I do, but it is not unusual for her to sleep until 10 to 10:30 even!

Exhibit B:  Now I know this picture is kind of grainy because I had to blow it up - but check out these teeth!



I mean seriously!  I think I could rest my case on those babies alone!  (She's either headed to vampirism or beaverism...oh, I'm kidding.)

I will give you that she does reflect in mirrors and she can go out in the sun and all - without sparkling.  But surely vampires have figured out how to get past that problem by now, right?  Maybe if I'd actually read those Twilight books I might have learned that secret. Regardless of all that - don't you think this is a golden opportunity?  I think I should write to Hollywood and send a picture of those teeth along.  We could be set for life!

12 comments:

minivan soapbox said...

What the hell are you going to do when she starts school!?!? Sleeping until 10:00 is awesome...But wait till you have to wake that Angel up at 7:00 AM for Kindergarten! THEN you'll really see the teeth! :)

for a different kind of girl said...

Vampires are gold! You could so potentially be set for life! I kind of think my youngest son is turning vampire, too. Lately, he's taken to running up to me, jumping on my lap, and then swooping in to pretend to bite me on the neck. Of course, I then have to play along that he's actually doing it.

Now, if I could just get him to sleep in to fully test this vampire theory...

Fragrant Liar said...

Definitely vampire material. Do not piss her off!

The Queen said...

Princess was a night owl too.. I mean 3 in the morning.. she works days and she still struggles with that... and um.. she got my teeth,, so she really had the vampire thing going.

Then,, goth.. she was goth her entire teens... totally goth.... black everything..

the good news is,, she outgrew the whole goth, vampire thing...

anymommy said...

It's the next big thing!! My four year old is still in her crib. So is my 2 1/2 year old. I heart cribs.

Captain Dumbass said...

The mirror trick might just be a wig and lots of makeup. Check her hair.

Miss Yvonne said...

This is so weird, because my kid just bit me on the back of the neck. Literally. I don't know. It's just this weird thing he's always done. Don't ask.

Maybe you could convince your dentist to do a little subtle shaving of her eye teeth next time your in the office. You know, just to enhance the look.

Laggin said...

Does she have super human strength? Does she accidentally break your ribs when giving you a bear hug? That's the TRUE test.

Maggie May said...

what cute vittle teeth!!

i loved Anne Rice.

Kate Coveny Hood said...

Hilarious. Especially the part about Anne Rice. Her Vampire erotica probably inspired that Stephanie Myers upstart.

bernthis said...

My daughter is EXACTLY the same way. The kid never falls asleep until at least 9-9:30pm. Thankfully, she also hates to get up which works very well for mommy on the weekends

msprimadonna67 said...

Children numbers one and two always dutifully hit the hay when I put them to bed at a reasonable hour. Child number three, always one to do her own thing, NEVER went to bed at at anything resembling a normal child's bedtime. I managed to pass on some of of my own nightowl-ness, and she's got it bad. I never explored the obvious vampire connection. Obviously, I'm going to have to start watching her a little more carefully...