Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Thirty-Nine

And so, now it is my turn.

I wrote a whole post last night about whether or not I could make this year as important as it has become in my head.  Except I was a couple of glasses of wine in, and I felt - in retrospect this morning - that it was a little bit too dramatic and whiny.  (And I wonder where Wonderboy gets it!)

The reason I feel this way about this year is that this is the age my Mom was when she died.  Forty never happened for her.  I know mentally, that I am perhaps putting too much pressure on myself to make it all happen This Year. But I can't keep hanging around waiting for some epiphany to motivate me.  If this is what is going to spurn me into some kind of action, then so be it.  There are things that I want to do, things that I want to get accomplished.  A year from now I want to be able to look back and say, "Here I am, Mom.  Further then you ever got to be.  But look, look at what I have done.  Know that it was inspired by you."

And so, with that good stuff in mind, I'm off to have cake for breakfast. Because really, what better way is there to start your birthday?

12 comments:

minivan soapbox said...

Happy Birthday Sweetie...Have TWO pieces of cake for breakfast!

for a different kind of girl said...

Happy birthday, sweet lady! I think you definitely have it in you to make this a fantastic year. Without question...and, if necessary, with more cake!

Jules said...

Happy Birthday! Eat cake, do whatever makes YOU happy!!!!!

Cheryl said...

Happy 39th you sweet young thang! Eat cake for breakfast, expensive chocolates for lunch, and have dinner catered. I'm looking forward to your coming year of adventure.

Aging Mommy said...

Enjoy your cake, enjoy your 40th year and just know that whatever you do during it your Mom would be oh so very proud of you and all that you have accomplished and just what a great woman and Mom you turned out to be.

anymommy said...

No better way. Happy, happy birthday, may the year hold all that you hope for it.

Carolyn...Online said...

Happy Birthday!!! I hope you have a great year and get lots of peace and happiness.

myfluffybunnies said...

Your mom would be so very proud of you no matter what you accomplish this year. Having said that, hope you have a kick-ass 39th birthday, and have some cake for me! =>

佳蓉佳蓉 said...

成熟,就是有能力適應生活中的模糊。.................................................................

msprimadonna67 said...

I'm so sorry I missed your birthday--I hope it was a wonderful one! I know what you mean, too. I'm not too far off from the ages my mom and dad never made it to. I can be sobering, but also a great impetus. Here's to many more wonderful, memory-filled, meaningful years ahead for you.

Zip n Tizzy said...

OK - I thought I remembered your birthday sliding in right after mine. And you didn't even say anything you sneaky girl.
Happy Birthday! Sorry I'm late. This year will be fabulous, and I think it will bring some closure too. Seal up the mystique. Really brings home how young she was.
xo

Phoebe's Pretty Pictures said...

all you need is a willingness and a great therapist. Okay, maybe that's just me.

Also, from now on I'll be commenting as phoebesprettypictures which is my daughter's blog

blogger won't let me sign in as bernthis on some blogs.

Ay!